Sunday, August 06, 2006

Zipper

It is starting to irritate him. At first, he just thought that it was just bollocks and did not pay any attention to it at all. Thinking back, perhaps he should have heeded the advice. He had better do something about it before it starts to get out of hand.

Embarrassment is something that had occurred to everyone before. Some people get into embarrassing situations on a regular basis, some people seldom get embarrassed at all, some people don’t really feel embarrassed though the situation they are in would be deemed as embarrassing for most while some people get embarrassed by the slightest things that happen. One thing for sure, embarrassment is something everyone would avoid to encounter as much as possible. No doubt, the recent spate of embarrassing events that repeatedly interrupt his life is making Jamin extremely irritated.

2 months ago, Jamin went on an expedition to the Sahara desert. On the very first day he set foot on the desert, he met this shady looking Moroccan who offered to be his tour guide. Jamin felt that it would defeat the purpose of an expedition if he were to hire the Moroccan, so he rejected him. However, the pesky Moroccan refused to leave and insisted on being his tour guide unless Jamin could find an acceptable reason to reject him. Jamin tried all his means to shake the Moroccan off but to no avail. Finally, he told him that he had no money and was too poor to hire him. The Moroccan expressed his displeasure and scolded Jamin for wasting his time. Being a temperamental person by nature, Jamin had been tempted to punch the Moroccan on many occasions. He did not want to hold himself back anymore and was about to deliver a knuckle to the Moroccan’s big nose when the Moroccan spoke again.

This time, he said that he happened to be offering a fortune telling service as well. It became pretty obvious to Jamin that all the Moroccan was asking for was simply a knockout blow to his head. But Jamin thought that it would be best not to create trouble in a foreign land. Afterall, there were many other people around the area. Using the same reason, Jamin said that he was unable to afford. This is time the Moroccan smiled and pointed to Jamin’s hat. Barter? Jamin did not know whether to laugh or to feel ridiculed. But he was impressed by the persistence of the Moroccan. He would make a good salesman. Despite that, Jamin insisted that he was not interested to use any of his belongings as a payment. Resigned to fate, the Moroccan turned back and walked away. As he was walking away, he said, ‘I will tell you this for free. You will be terribly embarrassed for the months to come unless you employ one of my services.’ At that point in time, Jamin thought that the Moroccan sounded ridiculous, but just dismissed it as a combination of being sour and poor usage of English (he probably had meant ‘terribly sorry’ instead of ‘embarrassed’).

Now it all dawn upon him. He was put under a curse. No wonder he keeps getting himself embarrassed. Over and over again. On Monday, he remembered Marc telling him that his pants were unzipped the minute he met him at a restaurant. On Tuesday, Lesnar told him that his pants were unzipped when they were both on a train. On Wednesday, a young lady walked past him, screamed ‘EEEWWW!’ and ran away. On Thursday, he suddenly felt a little too airy down there when he realized that his fly was open. As he was zipping up his pants, passersby gave him disgusted looks. On Friday, he was told to get lost when he was ordering food from the canteen. The stallholder was obviously offended by his open fly. On Saturday, he was running to catch a bus and he felt his pants going down lower and lower. An unzipped pair of pants would naturally get looser and looser especially when you are running. And today. He had been told by at least 5 different people that his fly was open. If it is not a curse, Jamin would have no other explanation for it.

Jamin felt that it would be best for him to avoid the crowd until he could somehow break the curse. After spending some time thinking on his couch, he finally had a solution. To solve the zipper problem, he just needs to get rid of the zipper. He just has to wear pants without zips! He immediately changed into a pair of shorts, with no zippers, and hurriedly went down for lunch. Finally, he has the courage to go out without having to worry about when his pants would suddenly unzip on their own.

He finished his lunch and was walking on the streets when he received a flyer that was offering a free membership to the new gym. Since the new gym was just around the corner, Jamin decided to check it out.

He went in and walked around. He saw a weighing scale at a corner and went on it. To his shock, he had gained 30 kg.

‘Hahah… Don’t be too shocked. If you don’t exercise, you will naturally get fat. Hahahaha.. That’s what the gym membership is for. Don’t worry, there’s still hope for you. After working out for some time here, you will find that you will not struggle to zip up your pants anymore.’ One of the gym users who caught him in his state of shock told him.

Posted by champion of the world at 9:24 PM |  

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